THANK GOP FOR THE KGB…I MEAN…THE USSS…[ Just kidding boys & girls… ]
(Nobody here but us red roosters…)
81-Year-Old Liberals Now Terror Threat
Like most Americans, 81-year-old Dan Tilli isn't a big fan of President Bush. And like many older Americans, he writes letters to the editor of his local paper, The Express-Times in Easton.
Unlike most Americans, Dan Tilli got a visit from the Secret Service after writing a letter bashing President Bush. The letter was published in Monday's Express-Times and concluded with the line: "I still believe they hanged the wrong man." I'd assume he was saying they (the Iraqis?) should have hung Osama Bin Laden instead, but the Secret Service agents decided to drive 60 miles from Philly to Easton to check out if he was thinking about hurting President Bush.
The Secret Service showed up Thursday and chatted with Tilli for an hour before deciding he was not a threat. They asked him a few questions -- including if he was thinking about committing suicide, to which he responded "Hell no!" -- and checked his closets for weapons, which he agreed to. (In addition to posing no threat to President Bush, Tilli also doesn't have boxes of Oxycontin in his closet.) Oddly enough, the Secret Service enjoyed their visit, too! I swear to God this is in the article:
Fortunately for Tilli, his case file is already closed. (81-year-olds who don't even know how to get to Washington, D.C., are rarely on the Secret Service's radar for long.) Tilli is going to keep writing, though: "He [the agent] said they are good letters." Let's hope he doesn't comment on Dick Cheney's hunting accident, lest he get a visit about wanting to shoot the veep. (How would he acquire the means to hang President Bush, anyway? Shoot I can understand, but not hang.)
Writer finds an agent -- from the Secret Service [Express-Times]
81-Year-Old Liberals Now Terror Threat
Like most Americans, 81-year-old Dan Tilli isn't a big fan of President Bush. And like many older Americans, he writes letters to the editor of his local paper, The Express-Times in Easton.
Unlike most Americans, Dan Tilli got a visit from the Secret Service after writing a letter bashing President Bush. The letter was published in Monday's Express-Times and concluded with the line: "I still believe they hanged the wrong man." I'd assume he was saying they (the Iraqis?) should have hung Osama Bin Laden instead, but the Secret Service agents decided to drive 60 miles from Philly to Easton to check out if he was thinking about hurting President Bush.
The Secret Service showed up Thursday and chatted with Tilli for an hour before deciding he was not a threat. They asked him a few questions -- including if he was thinking about committing suicide, to which he responded "Hell no!" -- and checked his closets for weapons, which he agreed to. (In addition to posing no threat to President Bush, Tilli also doesn't have boxes of Oxycontin in his closet.) Oddly enough, the Secret Service enjoyed their visit, too! I swear to God this is in the article:
Secret Service agent Kenneth Beauchamp said he enjoyed his visit with
Tilli.
"He was an interesting man to talk to," Beauchamp said. "He seemed like
a very nice gentleman."
Fortunately for Tilli, his case file is already closed. (81-year-olds who don't even know how to get to Washington, D.C., are rarely on the Secret Service's radar for long.) Tilli is going to keep writing, though: "He [the agent] said they are good letters." Let's hope he doesn't comment on Dick Cheney's hunting accident, lest he get a visit about wanting to shoot the veep. (How would he acquire the means to hang President Bush, anyway? Shoot I can understand, but not hang.)
Writer finds an agent -- from the Secret Service [Express-Times]
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